|Move over DisneyLand! The world's first theme park based on a 3000 year-old concept - a Library! Journalists, public officials and other invited guests were treated to a premier preview of Library World" before the theme park's public opening.
Divided into a number of different "lands", the park promises to cater to every interest, need, and reading level.
Library World" was designed, conceived, and personally constructed, by Biblia, the Warrior Librarian. From the first encounter with Parking Station Mayhem", to trying to navigate the Exit Gates from Hell", visitors to Library World" will find themselves challenged, engaged, and amused beyond anything they have ever experienced.
[OK, now we've written that, please release the editor's grandparents.]
||Although originally denying that the theme park would frighten people, the designer later stated that people enjoy a good fright. "Look at how successful Steven King and Edgar Allan Poe have been."
"We just adapted the concept of the roller-coaster when we developed the Library Trolley of Death" ride." The Federal Division of Public Safety is still monitoring the use of 3 wooden book trolleys, with a total of 7 functioning wheels between them, tied together with book binding tape, and pushed down the disabled access ramp.
There was some concern over the Truth in Advertising regulations when the Voyeur's View" exhibit was found to consist entirely of a standard range of fiction books, housed in a dark room behind black curtains. The red flashing neon X certainly seemed misleading.
||Library World" operators explained that libraries were often forced to use such ruses for promotional purposes, in order to compete with amusement arcades.
Cashing in on the adage that we are all afraid the unknown, the Cave of Fear" is a dimly lit area housing encyclopedias, dictionaries, and other reference material, complete with fake lightening flashes and pre-recorded thunder.
Visitors are in for a surprise when they enter the Chamber of Horrors", the cleverly re-named rest rooms.
[Can the editor at least speak with his grandparents by phone to make sure they're OK?]
A not-for-profit venture, the park's operators said that the objective was not to make money, it was to get people to appreciate how much fun a library could be.